February 2006 Archives

I've done horribly this week and I'm really scared to even go near the scale now. I just kinda poke it out of the way with a stick to get to the tub...

I feel like shit most of the time now and I really don't have any way of changing that. My back is always sore and my pants are too tight and you know what? It's really scary to see your backside closeup in a HUGE full length mirror. I have a JLo butt on a non-JLo body type. Really kinda ugly...

I haven't worked out in ages and my diet is as crazy as a three ring circus. I think I'm just going to have to start over; completely over. The only good thing that came out of this was that I've managed to remain under 159 pounds. So you can average it out to 2 pounds lost in 30 days. Probably not a good ratio but it's still progress.

Anyway. I guess new updates soon? And how about a new layout? I'm not feeling the butterflies lately...

I want you all to think of the scariest place to be in an earthquake. Alright, in a basement or at the bottom of a massive mudslide come to mind but I'm thinking of a tiny quake, right here in the middle of Capital. Nobody? Alright, how about a wine store with open shelving and large amounts of bottles that could fall at any moment creating a huge mess of sticky (staining!) grape juice? Yeah, terrifying, I know!

Well my worst nightmare almost happened yesterday. There was a 4.5 magnitude quake that shook up everything in the store. I mean bottles were clinking together! I’m there behind my cash panicking about where I should run or what I should save first! Honestly I was thinking of Jackson-Triggs Gold Label Meritage (best Meritage ever! We only have 6 bottles left…) or the Inniskillin Cabernet Franc Icewine (80 bucks a pop!). Isn’t it sad that I was more concerned with the wine than my own safety?? Look at what retail has done to me! *gah* But to be truthful, I didn’t move an inch. I merely stared wide eyed at the little girl and her mother in the store. They both laughed at me… evil them. I haven’t felt an earthquake in at least 10 years… they’re kinda scary O.o

Speaking of retail, I gave in my resignation for the Bay on Wednesday. I was all cool about it on the way there but as soon as I spoke to my manager I got a little choked up. No crying for me but at least I didn’t burn any bridges on the way out. But I was a little depressed about it; we ended up eating at Wendy’s after. I really wasn’t in a great mood to say no to Phil anyway (he’s seriously addicted to that place!) in any case, as it turned out, my last day was yesterday. I said good bye to a lot of the people there and then sauntered off to work at the wine store. Needless to say the day did end with a little bit of a “shocker”…

I was woken up this morning by the sounds of the winds cutting through everything! Freezing rain and 63km/h winds makes today a very very cold day (minus 26 is über cold). I'm too scarred to go out for a walk like I promised myself I would do. I bought some really awsome mukluks that I need to break in! I've also been meaning to get to the library for the past two months! I need some new reading stock and to print my resignation letter. My stupid printer is being retarded...

In other news, the diet is going okay. I did some baking last night and made my really famous biscuits. They're made with whole wheat flour but are 99.9 % fat. But sooo good warmed with a little bit of melted butter or jam. I probably had a dozen to myself before I felt sick.... *sigh* why maddy must you make delicious foods? I'm going to add this to my list of recipes and then you'll see too they're good :D

I weighed myself this morning and was delighted when I noticed my new weight! 155 pounds baby! I've always found that dieting was hard to do and I was never motivated to keep it up cause I never really saw any progress or changes. I'm silly that way but if I don't see results right away I fall off the wagon. But nonetheless; almost three weeks in and I've lost 6 pounds total! That's 0.35 lbs a day! Yay for me! :D

So... I left for few days and all hell breaks loose! I'm sick again! I think it has to do with changing my lifestyle around so drastically; I mean cutting out sweets (which is like Oxygen: Essential) and then working out as well. Geez girl you're on your wall all right; on my way to a total and complete body melt down... or head explosion. Which ever one comes first.

I signed up at SparkPeople a few days ago and I'm totally obsessed, finally something that combines my two goals in life: ONE to lose weight in a manageable way without getting brain everywhere and TWO spend as many hours in front of the computer as humanly possibe cause I have no other means of social distraction. So NAH! I'm happy though cause I've lost 3lbs. BTW, I got the site from Purl, I swear to god she probably thinks I'm stalking her....

I have been feeling a little lethargic these past few days and I'm not really sure why. It's really weird. I'm up until all hours of the night and then once I get to sleep I can't seem to get up. It takes me hours to fully awaken and it's exhausting just to think of working out or even just to eat. Perhaps there is something wrong with my thyroid as my doctor thinks there is. I have yet to go get my blood test and it's been almost two weeks since I had my appointment.

My energy levels would make a rollercoaster look tame and I can never tell what's going to happen in a day because I could either have enough spark to climb Mount Everest or I could feel as dead as a branch. For example, yesterday. I was in such a great mood and had so much energy (even though there wasn't a soul in the entire mall) that I actually completed a sketchDebrii - New Warriors by Skottie Young. COMPLETED! I never ever do that... I'm usually too bored with my results (or completely annoyed at the lack thereof) and just toss them aside. Needless to say that I have no energy today to do any more sketches. Even though all the ideas I have are giving me a headache.

Nothing much else to say, although I might not be online for a couple of days. I need to get all this straightened out and I need to do something before I die of exhaustion.

It was a sad momemt for myself today when I lost the battle with the candy distributor machine in the lunch room at work. I seriously couldn't help it and I was PMS'ing really bad. I just needed a few to get through the last four hours of work. And so I only took a few *ahem* handfulls of Mike Ikes and stuffed them in my pockets then ran away... Other than that I did pretty well food wise. Go day 10!

Breakfast: Oatmeal and sliced orange
Lunch: Falafel pita, veggies in couscous, fruit salad and apple juice (mmmm... I looooove Lebanese food)
Supper: Turkey and zucchini stir fry, fettuccini alfredo

I've been stressed out for a few days now (funny how quickly you get stressed all over again when come back from vacation) and I am seriously considering quitting one of my two jobs. I currently work at The Bay and at a wine store. Well the good ol' people at the Bay have cut my hours considerably and it really isn't worth my time to continue working there. My resignation letter is all typed up and ready to go. I just have no balls to go and drop it off yet... I really like my job but when it costs me and hours pay to go and come back for a 3 or 4 hour shift then it's not really getting me anywhere. Anyway... no more about work.

I have recently restarted doing some drawings for a friend of mine's story. I have them all in my head at the moment cause there seems to be a cutoff of somewhere between my brain and my pencil hand because what I see in my head is not what I see on paper. I'm a huge fan of Michael Turner and Skottie Young, two completely different styles of comics but ones I would love to emulate... pretty big brain fart right now, so I'll let you know how that's coming along.

I was a good little maddy today! I actually stayed within my "healthy food" regime :D

Breakfast: Oatmeal
Lunch: Veggie Burger (Whole wheat bun, tomatoe, lettuce, cheese), Coke
Supper: Maddy Stir Fry, turkey breast

In between everything I had water. Not a single sweet food craving; which is really hard to believe considering that I did the grocery shopping alone (Phil wouldnt' have been able to say no to my not so healthy food choices)

I added my progress photos. Not much there 'cause there hasn't been any progress but eventually, over the next couple of weeks, there'll be another one. Now go poke at my pudge! GO!

ugh... i'm not feeling well. Very nauseaus and big fat migrains. I can barely keep down my oatmeal. I wish i could stay in bed all day; I could though considering that I'm not working until Monday but I'm so sick of sleeping right now. I'm really really not used to taking a week off from work.

And to make things worse... i gained a pound back. I mean what do you expect? It's only day 5.

So today is yesterday's update. If that makes any sense to you good for you here's a cookie (or if you prefer not too, a day old piece of lettuce). If not, by-pass this line completely.

I weighed my self today just for the fun of it: loss 2 pounds! I was so excited I was telling everyone! Hehehe... telling strangers was the best. I love it when people think I'm insane!

I didn't do much of a workout today only a few sit ups and two very meagre attempts at some push ups (truthfully, I only did one full push up the other try was me just laying in position on the floor imagining my self doing a push up...) We then went to the chiropractor and boy did that feel awsome! I hadn't been since before I started my college degree; and I graduated in May! My doctor is also a really good homeopathic doc and he knew right away that I've been having severe migrains. How you ask? He felt the bone in my head and said that they were causing undue heat in my cranial area which were giving me the headeaches. Silly I know but he did some light touching on my forehead and I felt my body cool down completely. It was pretty cool actually and I feel much better now. Whoever said that homeopathic and chiropractic medicin was crap is a big piece of poo. Smelly smelly poo.

Anyway. We had guests over tonight for dinner and I made my somewhat famous "Quick Fix (crock pot) Chicken". It's made with apricot jam, french dressing and onion soup mix. Very tasty. And had it with fresh greens and potatoes and even asperagus. Check out a picture here. The guests brought over dessert and I caved really badly for this dessert: Chocolate Swirl Cheesecake. Don't kill me. It was delicious and I'd have another bite right now if I could. So there! Take that and run with it.

On a completely different note: It's our 6 month wedding anniversary today (Feb 2)!